Your tutor has also embedded comments [in bold and in brackets] within your essay.

Your tutor has also embedded comments [in bold and in brackets] within your essay.
Writing Strength:
You include specific examples well in this extract:
At first, my biggest challenge were understanding how to traversed through blackboard. After I concurred the issues within blackboard, it was very delightful to be a online student at Monroe College.
Well done for describing a specific issue that arose with the online learning to help illustrate your main idea that there are pros and cons to studying online.
*, you requested help with Main Idea/Thesis:
You may be able to outline your main ideas in a sentence in your introduction so that readers have a strong preview of your content. In this draft, you include this main idea in your introduction:
• Online learning is convenient for students, but it comes at a considerable cost.
****This is a strong reflection of the content you develop, but look at a way you could add more detail about the topics you develop:
Online learning is convenient for students because ______, but it comes at a considerable cost because ______.
Which reasons could you fit into the gaps to show readers what you will develop? Then, look at another option to make sure readers see what your main idea is:
Online learning and traditional classes are equally effective despite differences in _______ and ________.
This is another way to phrase the sentence to make sure it accurately represents your views. Consider adding specific topics into your thesis statement and make sure it closely reflects the ideas you develop.
Content Development
Next, you could develop each point from the thesis statement fully in a new body paragraph so that similar sentences sit together. This grouping of information into paragraphs will make sure readers get the points. Look at the way one of your paragraphs begins:
• I agree that online education provides people with the flexibility of schedule that traditional classroom education does not provides.
You begin this paragraph by saying that online classes are useful because they are flexible. However, you only illustrate this point in the next paragraph:
• A five minute grace period is honored before marking a individual late or absent. Therefore, a student do not have time to review any notes or any homework assignments.
This example supports the idea that online classes are better when it comes to fitting them into one’s schedule because they are flexible. You could position all the sentences which develop this point about the classes being flexible into one paragraph. Then, when you discuss another point, such as the problem of accessing the internet, you can use a new paragraph to present and illustrate the idea.
*you requested help with Grammar & Mechanics:
You need to make your verbs agree with their subjects when using the present tense to help readers connect these words while reading. Look at these examples of subject-verb agreement first:
Online learning allows people to stay at home.
Classrooms allow students to socialize.
When the subject is singular, the verb “allows” has an “s” on the end. When the subject is plural, the verb has no “s” on the end. Now, look at this sentence from your text:
• Where as online learning allow students to study when it is most convenient for them.
You use the singular subject “online learning.” You can use the singular form of the verb “allows” to agree with this subject. Look for subject-verb agreement as you proofread this draft.
*****Summary of Next Steps: **********
* Make sure the thesis statement reflects your main ideas closely.
* Develop each reason for or against online learning in a new paragraph.
* Make verbs agree with subjects
_________________________________________________________________________________
Please look for comments [in bold and in brackets] in your essay below.
Thank you for submitting your work to Smarthinking! We hope to see you again soon.
The quality of education has seen a plunge ever since the internet introduced the concept of online learning and the pandemic took place back in March of 2020. Online learning is convenient for students, but it comes at a considerable cost. For me, online learning is a phenomenal way to learn and earn your degree. The online platform has provided me with the opportunity to continue my studies, at my own pace. In order to excel by utilizing the online learning tool, the individual must be motivated, devoted and eager to learn.
Online learners are able to engage with their peers and instructors, just how they would in a traditional classroom setting. Many professors make themselves available by phone, email and text message, which provides a prompt response within 24 hours. for online users. Weekly office hours are also available, lecture notes are posted on blackboard by professors. A great deal of students find it very suitable to concentrate and get things done in a timely fashion utilizing the online learning platform. Balancing professional, family and school life can be very challenging at times. However, online learning allowed numerous students to study at anytime throughout the day.
The only mishap that may transpire while making use of the the online learning platform via traditional classroom learning, is poor internet connection. This may cause a delay in submission of assignments, even increase absenteeism. Online education has strong performance assessment mechanisms. At first, my biggest challenge were understanding how to traversed through blackboard. After I concurred the issues within blackboard, it was very delightful to be a online student at Monroe College. [You mention two drawbacks in this paragraph: unstable internet connection and difficulties learning to use the interface. You also mention the positive assessment mechanisms. You can choose the main points and develop these ideas in separate paragraphs.] I am currently twenty-four credits shy of my bachelor degree. In my personal opinion, without this online features, this would’ve not be feasible.
I agree that online education provides people with the flexibility of schedule that traditional classroom education does not provides. However, students who are pursuing their studies online, are receiving the same quality education as a student attending traditional classes. Upon resuming back to college after taking a few years off, I had experience with online learning and traditional classes. Both have been a very remarkable experience. Nevertheless, I had the ability to prosper more attending school online. [You have not developed any specific examples in this paragraph. Which example could you use to either support online learning or show why it is difficult?]
My work schedule allowed me to allot ample amount of time to complete assignments in the comfort of my own home. Attending traditional classes in a classroom setting, can put a strain on a person. Thus, after being in the office for a long period of time during the day, than have to rush directly to school can become very overwhelming. Professors start the lecture at approximately 6:30 pm sharp. A five minute grace period is honored before marking a individual late or absent. Therefore, a student do not have time to review any notes or any homework assignments. Where as online learning allow students to study when it is most convenient for them. Individuals are able to utilize as much time that they needs to complete any assignments. Traditional classroom learning allot three hours a week. Moreover, if you have questions or concerns you may still may have to email or attend the professor’s office hours to receive clarification. Nevertheless, my personal opinion, online, traditional learning are the same, it is more of a preference of the student.
Please revise and add the suggestions. Please make sure the verbs will match the subject